Writing Short vs. Long: Which is Right?

When is it wise to write short vs. long? Depends on the merchandise you sell. Consider both approaches:

Short Copy Approach

When is the right time to use long copy vs. short? Let’s analyze Chico’s and two other multichannel apparel marketers, J. Jill and Talbots, and their use of short text.

Chicos’ short, arty, loose approach to dressing:

Fun Up Tanya Jacket
$138.00
Embroidery and appliqué accent an artistic swirl pattern on this eye-catching denim jacket. Slash front pockets. Imported. 98% Cotton, 2% Spandex.
Machine wash.

J. Jill’s simple, loose approach to dressing:

Beloved Denim Jacket
Feminine and flattering with waist-shaping details. Button-front placket. Curved flap pockets and on-seam pockets. Banded hem. 231⁄2˝ mid-hip length, 221⁄2˝ petite, 241⁄2˝ tall, 25˝ women’s. In ultra soft cotton infused with Lycra® spandex. Machine wash. Imported. $79

Talbots’ classic dressing with more extensive copy:

Striped denim jacket
The perfect go-to travel jacket that knows how to step out as well as hang out. Yarn-dyed, railroad stripes with contrast stitching, snap front, patch pockets, slit cuffs. Inset back belt and princess seams. Length from center back neck: misses 22˝; petite 211⁄4˝; woman 26˝; woman petite 241⁄2˝.
Cotton/spandex. Machine wash. Imported.
$98.00

Pictures for these products are all similar in size and display of the product. So the thing that tells the story most clearly — and differentiates the catalogs — is the copy. With Chico’s, many shoppers would be hard-pressed to spend $138 on that jacket without touching it and learning more. So, based on that and Chico’s catalog’s continuous couponing approach, it’s safe to assume the catalog is primarily a retail driver.

Short-copy catalogs’ brief descriptions don’t reveal what their garments are really like. So retail presence is essential for customers who need to touch and feel a product in order to figure out what they need to purchase.

Long Copy Approach

The stereo systems and other electronics offered up in the Crutchfield catalog represent a good example of a successful catalog with products more complex than denim jackets. With a jacket, either it fits you or it doesn’t. With stereo components, there are issues such as compatibility, sound quality and addendum components needed to complete installation. All that requires more extensive copy.

In addition, tearing out an old car stereo system and replacing it with a new one is a far bigger deal than trying a jacket on; it’s many hours of time, and not a job you want to do more than once if you can help it. So credibility is highly dependent on information and proof that this is the right decision.

A “red carpet” in the Crutchfield catalog shows how great copy can enroll even a skeptical prospect. While these prospects are tired of being disappointed by support staff who are either uneducated or perhaps outsourced to a foreign country, Crutchfield provides them with the perfect antidote — tech support that speaks their language.

In the Crutchfield catalog, one of the keys to success is its generous use of added-value space. This is not frivolous stuff in these copy blocks — one page is dedicated to technical support and two pages to, “Which in-dash car stereo is right for you?” It’s simply written and to-the-point, but nevertheless full of great ideas, such as helping the reader pinpoint the features he’d use the most, whether an iPod can be connected, and so on.

The second of these two pages has a chart that’s been meticulously designed for easy reading. It offers the names of different systems, on which page in the catalog they can be found, which music formats they support and so on.

The Crutchfield body copy generally is about products that are in the $150 range and up — and it tends to have 1.5- to two-times more words than the Talbots’ product descriptions in that same price range. But it’s well-written, not dry or boring, and it’s chock full of information — but only the information that’s really needed. On the Crutchfield Web site where space is basically unlimited, descriptions go deeper and include bullet points and lots of details to drill down to.

Carol Worthington-Levy is partner of creative services at Lenser, a catalog consultancy. You can reach her at (408) 269-6871 or carol.worthington-levy@lenser.com.